I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
farters have to be the big spoon...
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
