i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
