i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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