he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
