Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
