does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
