there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize