I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
