the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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