why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
