they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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