I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
