Someone shit on the floor
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Is it because I queefed?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
