pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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