Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
