Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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