just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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