the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Everclear isn't food dammit
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Randomize
