brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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