I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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