so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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