I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
