Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Naked. naked and bneed help.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
