nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize