Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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