Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
