I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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