I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
