Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
