i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
