another moral hangover. fuck.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
