She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
