keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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