You can't motorboat a personality
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
