You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
