Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
