we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
