I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
