are you still at the devil's house?
plz talk dirty to me
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Can't talk, ducks in the car
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
