It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Randomize
