margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
