Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
she peed on how many people?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize