I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
