I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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