Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
