awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
