I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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