Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
