why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
