How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
